Loved it, obviously identify so hard. I have no idea how to be anything but calm confident and capable in most situations too, I wrote about it in my PD group essay (though I used a defense mechanism theory to fit it into psychodynamic academic thinking).
It's hard pushing back on people's reactions. I also feel so unprepared and have no idea what to say. Lots of people I have told have immediately started asking me what the symptoms are... and it's just so hard to articulate it on the spot without it sounding like 'stuff everyone does sometimes' (or maybe that's just the fear I have of what is about to come) so I either end up floundering or say its too complicated or that 'it's a brain & memory problem and ironically that makes it hard for me to explain.'
But I soooooo want to explain. Because what I secretly desperately want is for someone to go 'oh yeah you obviously have all those things, that's so you'. And some people even have. You have. My boyfriend has. Mum. Lifetime best friends. All the people that really really know me. It's weird sort of wishing your 'ailment' was worse/more visible. I'm sure it's better that it's not really.
But feck me did I go through a lot of shame based emotional pain post diagnosis because I didn't think I deserved the label of adhd and I was so scared of people rejecting me and my decisions around it (ironically linked to rejection sensitivity dysphoria, which is a common adhd symptom).
So bloody grateful I have people like you, so that I know that I'm not just totally delusional!
Thanks Becky! It is so important to have people who understand us. Especially when there have been so many years when people don't. It just feels so different, doesn't it? Not having to explain and justify, but just being able to tell the stories of your latest disaster and laugh. Oh the sweet power of identification : D
The rejection sensitivity dysphoria is really tricky, I know. And again, this is why it's so important to create little bubbles where you can thrive <3
This is why newsletters and online communities/support groups can be so wonderful.
Thanks so much for this thoughtful reply, and good luck keeping track of everything today! xx
Incredibly helpful explanations for people like me who aren't burdened but may not recognise those who are and as a consequence respond, unintentionally, unthinkingly and unsympathetically. Ignorance is not bliss for anyone.
Loved it, obviously identify so hard. I have no idea how to be anything but calm confident and capable in most situations too, I wrote about it in my PD group essay (though I used a defense mechanism theory to fit it into psychodynamic academic thinking).
It's hard pushing back on people's reactions. I also feel so unprepared and have no idea what to say. Lots of people I have told have immediately started asking me what the symptoms are... and it's just so hard to articulate it on the spot without it sounding like 'stuff everyone does sometimes' (or maybe that's just the fear I have of what is about to come) so I either end up floundering or say its too complicated or that 'it's a brain & memory problem and ironically that makes it hard for me to explain.'
But I soooooo want to explain. Because what I secretly desperately want is for someone to go 'oh yeah you obviously have all those things, that's so you'. And some people even have. You have. My boyfriend has. Mum. Lifetime best friends. All the people that really really know me. It's weird sort of wishing your 'ailment' was worse/more visible. I'm sure it's better that it's not really.
But feck me did I go through a lot of shame based emotional pain post diagnosis because I didn't think I deserved the label of adhd and I was so scared of people rejecting me and my decisions around it (ironically linked to rejection sensitivity dysphoria, which is a common adhd symptom).
So bloody grateful I have people like you, so that I know that I'm not just totally delusional!
Thanks Becky! It is so important to have people who understand us. Especially when there have been so many years when people don't. It just feels so different, doesn't it? Not having to explain and justify, but just being able to tell the stories of your latest disaster and laugh. Oh the sweet power of identification : D
The rejection sensitivity dysphoria is really tricky, I know. And again, this is why it's so important to create little bubbles where you can thrive <3
This is why newsletters and online communities/support groups can be so wonderful.
Thanks so much for this thoughtful reply, and good luck keeping track of everything today! xx
Incredibly helpful explanations for people like me who aren't burdened but may not recognise those who are and as a consequence respond, unintentionally, unthinkingly and unsympathetically. Ignorance is not bliss for anyone.